SPEAKING OUT ABOUT SUICIDE
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Michele Elliott

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In the four months of October 2010 to February 2011, five young people, aged between 16 and 20, committed suicide in the Bay of Plenty forestry town of Kawerau. The first was 17-year-old Jordan Gray. A coroner’s inquest found that there wasn’t a copycat effect. But such geographic clusters continue to alarm. In 2012 there were 32 suicides in Northland compared to 17 the year before. And in 2011, the sudden deaths of four Wairarapa teenagers over a six month period cause similar unease. The concern is that when suicide occurs, others often follow, seemingly as a contagion effect.

When one of his friends took his life eight months earlier in February 2010, his mother Michele Elliott asked Jordan: “Why do you think he did that, son?” Jordan replied: “I don’t know, but don’t worry mum, it is never going to happen to me.”

We meet in the Kawerau town centre at a specially carved seat opposite the council offices.  “People suggested calling it the ‘The Suicide Reflection Seat’, but no one is going to sit on that,” she laughs. “I call it the tautoko (support) seat.” 

With the loss of her son, Michele struggled to help Jordan’s two younger brothers. In their grieving they directed much of their anger at their mother. She asked where she could get support. “I said: ‘I’m going into that dark place I don’t want to be and I really need help.” She was unable to find services to help her. 

Another suicide happened and Michele told a meeting of people representing social services in Kawerau how she was feeling.  Someone promised to get back to her, but never did. By then four more young people had taken their lives. “I was dissatisfied with their response so I took matters into my own hands. I devised a plan to set up support group for whanau bereaved by suicide”. 

She called a public meeting. Then Michele and others implemented the Kawerau Suicide Prevention Action Plan.  In the process, existing problems of engagement with the Kawerau’s services were improved. “They used to treat people like numbers. We told them they needed to learn how to respect anyone who walks in their door, especially grieving families.” 

Now there’s the Kawerau Immediate Response Team that brings together key individuals whenever there is a suicide or attempted suicide. Michele has since moved to Masterton, but the community support network she helped set up is now seen as a model for other communities to follow. Michele continues to speak out whenever she’s asked “My son is my inspiration to make positive change, to turn the tragedy to a positive. I don’t want to see any more lives lost.”

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This feature was first published in North & South magazine. Chris Barton completed this feature with the assistance of a media grant awarded by the Mental Health Foundation of New Zealand and the Frozen Funds Charitable Trust. The views expressed in this article do not necessarily represent the views of the Mental Health Foundation or the Frozen Funds Charitable Trust.  

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